I want to use this space to talk a bit about running roleplaying games, from my experience and filtering some of the great advice out there. It feels natural to start at the beginning of the process. Well almost at the beginning. The very beginning is getting hooked on a game and having this insane drive to want to run it for other people. I may come back to that. But lets start at the point this strange conviction has already set in and you need to form a group to play the game you’re itching to run.
Ever since I got hold of Frank Metzer’s D&D, back in 1989, I’ve been trying to find people to play with and setting up groups to do so. Back then it was a school lunchtime club that morphed into a Saturday game round a friend’s house. At university, I joined various existing groups which were focused on Vampire and Cyberpunk games which were the vogue in the mid-to-late 90s. After university, I was out of the hobby for a few years until 2007 when I posted an ad in the local hobby store, Southsea Models and Games. Soon after I was running my first D&D 4th edition games in all-day Sunday sessions and I even got my then girlfriend (now wife) to play.
When we moved to London, the way to organise groups was through Meetup and I found a group that has since outlived me, expanding and moving, even changing its name to broaden its appeal. My ability to make in-person sessions rapidly disappeared when I had my son in 2016 and then my daughter two years later. For a few years RPGs were something I wistfully thought about, rather than played.
Then the pandemic hit and after years of poo-pooing online roleplaying (except play-by-mail which I indulged in), I thought I’d give these new fangled virtual tabletops a go. Once I was bitten by the desire once again, I had to quickly work out how to get some players. The process for this hasn’t really changed over the last five years (yes, its been that long since the start of the pandemic, sorry to break it to you). So here is what I’ve done as recently as a few weeks ago and what I’ve learned from doing it.
Should you form a new group?
Now if you’re part of a regular gaming group or club and they’ve got their channels like WhatsApp or Meetup or some Discord, then you’ve already got a pool of potentially known quantities. This is great but it tends to be like most groups that you don’t form yourself, you’re competing for people’s limited attention and time. The best thing to do in that case is sign up for games and play them. Eventually, a spot may come up and you could be asked to run something.
This has its advantages but it isn’t for me. I am not ashamed to say, I like to run games more than play in them. I do like playing, don’t get me wrong. But its one-shots and convention games where I can play something once and be done with it. Put me anywhere near an RPG and I want to expand the world, think of interesting new scenarios and the dubious motives of a cast of characters. I am rarely enamoured by the character creation and development process enough to want to do that with just one of my inventions.
For the most part if you want to play face-to-face with people, who already play RPGs, you will likely have to tag along and build relationships, waiting your turn to run something. However, if you want to run RPGs now and don’t have the patience to wait your turn, the best thing to do is look for new players not already attached to a clique of GMs running their own games.
Bringing new players to the hobby is a joy. It doesn’t always work out but when it does, you’ve made a friend who will forever hold you responsible for getting them into this hobby. Absolutely new players are your existing friends, colleagues or family who you’ve broached the subject of your nerdy interests with, whose interest has been piqued and are willing to give it a go.
Remember with completely new players, this is often as much about the social setting and what they’re signing up for isn’t the cool system, setting or concept you have in mind but the opportunity to hang out, snack and have a good time with you. So be hospitable and suck them in with your wit and charm (or fake it). Give them time and you may find they’re reading the player’s manual by themselves. Or maybe not. Despite playing for several years with me, my wife really only plays as a social thing and leaves the hobby to me.
Where to post your notices
You can still in this day and age find new players by posting adverts in hobby shops and some online meetups are friendly to that kind of thing when its not just a pool of existing GMs running their own games. More organised clubs may allow someone to post and gauge interest but usually they have trial periods and queues because their pool of players is limited.
For online play, which is where with kids and work I do almost all my gaming now, the most success I’ve had and perhaps the biggest community for gathering players of all kinds is the /r/lfg subreddit. Read their posting rules first and see how the posts doing well in that space are formatted. What kind of questions do they ask? What kind of information do they provide?
Warning: If you’re not part of the new generation of D&D 5E players who grew up on actual play YouTube, you may find this a daunting process.
Yes, its different but not inherently bad. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t want to play in a lot of these games, but that’s ok. Its a cultural thing and I only need to be aware of some of the norms. They make the vast majority of the roleplaying community now. Yes, hate to break it to my fellow grognards but roleplaying has had a huge surge since Critical Role was released in 2015 which probably means the vast majority of roleplayers you’re going to rub shoulders with on the open internets are in their 20s and 30s.
Honestly, once you get past the 5E elements and the emphasis on portraying interpersonal drama through their characters, the main thing that is different is the focus on inclusivity and consideration of people’s differences. I could’ve done with a lot more of that in the 90s, so hey, the kids are alright in my books.
Anyway, you don’t have to and probably shouldn’t emulate all of that. You just need to find your niche within this bigger pool. And you have to accept that the vast majority of players on there want to play D&D 5E. But I’ve had no trouble forming groups to play Call of Cthulhu, OSR games, Traveller, Vampire, Free League games and whatever else over the last few years.
One tip is to post a couple of times, one in the early afternoon and one in the evening as the Reddit algorithm is brutal and you’re only going to get seen by a few hundred, maybe a thousand people, before it disappears in the sea with the others. Most of these people will not be in the right timezone or have the interests you need them to have. But with a couple of different posts you’ll get who you need.
The alternative to these big open spaces is to find some of the closed spaces like the Grognard Files or Raspy Raven discords. Or one of the other gaming podcasts that have their own discords. There’s a good bunch there playing but I like to branch out a bit and meet new people from different backgrounds. But as they say nowadays, you do you.
How to pick your players
If you’re casting your net in open waters, you need to be selective about your choice of players. You want players who want to be there and engage with the game you’re offering, who can rub along with other players and who show promise in showing up for games.
The first way to narrow the field is the game, system and setting you offer as well as any additional information you put in the post. The kind of game and setting does impact the kind of players you get but only on the margins. Most Vampire players, for example, are not trying to be extras in What We Do In the Shadows. But occassionally….
Most niche games, and frankly almost anything that isn’t 5E is niche in comparison, will get a nice variety of people who are intrigued or have previously played that kind of game. But 5E is a broad, broad church and this is often the group you will need to do the most filtering with.
However, don’t expect people to actually read your post before applying. I’ve taken to repeating the main points with an interactive checkbox or some such in a form used to apply. That way I can actually see whether they will enjoy what I’m offering.
Be prepared to make a short list of potential players and ask follow up questions using email or Discord. Ask them basic questions like what about your game appealed to them, are they available when you are planning to run your game, what have they played before. Gut check whether you feel this person is engaged and can interact with other people in a way that is healthy and conducive to everyone having a good time.
I’m still developing my sense of the kind of players that will work out. Sometimes the shy, never played before responder turns out to be the one who never misses a session and is always fully engaged. Sometimes the experienced old hand proves to be the most work or sometimes they’re super helpful, supporting you like a long-time friend.
Whilst its hard to tell from the screening process how exactly things will work out, there are red flags and you should trust your gut if something seems totally off.
How to make sure your group will work out
Once you’ve got your new group in place, you’re just starting your journey of forming this new group.
I highly recommend doing the following things with your new group:
- Run a session zero to set out your games concept, tone, aim and subject matter plus understand the needs of your players. I’m ambivalent about some safety tools – although I offer them. I think the most important thing is to make a space for players to communicate what they want and don’t want from the game. But here’s the dirty little secret, what they want may not be what you and the other players want. This is ok. Not every player was made for every table and vice versa. Its better to find out now than later. Of course, we want to make reasonable accommodations but if someone rocks up to your sword & sorcery game wanting to play a cosy game without any violence, don’t feel bad. Say goodbye and wish ’em well.
- Run a short adventure or trial period of three or more session. People can be on their best behaviour for 3 hours but few can contain their insanity for three sessions or more. You just gotta figure out whether their insanity is the kind you like to roll with or not. Also its good to gauge how reliable they are in attending games. If they miss more than one session in a short trial, you can probably expect to never see them after a couple of months.
- Get feedback from the players after a session or two. This is super important. I use a variant of the stars and wishes style of getting feedback. Not all players are willing or able to engage with feedback in this way. So don’t be shy and directly contact them to see how things are going from their perspective. Complete lack of engagement in this process is also a bit of warning shot.
- Shape the group by cutting out players that aren’t working out. There’s no shame in this and you’re not being cruel. You’re probably doing them a favour. If they’re obviously not enjoying it and not engaged, then they may feel beholden to turn up for a bit longer but eventually they will drift away. After three sessions, you’ve probably put your best foot forward and your game isn’t going to get a whole lot better (although could improve!). Release them to have a good time elsewhere.
Well, that’s probably enough advice from me. I’ll end by saying that I love forming new groups, meeting new players and playing different games. Some players and I have been gaming together for ages now. Others I haven’t played with for a long while due to circumstances such as moving away or having children. But when we do reconnect we have great memories to share. I personally can’t imagine only playing with the same handful of people. So I’d recommend putting yourself out there. Its a golden age for being a gamesmaster and the world needs more of us to do that.
Next time, I’ll try to make this shorter.